Barack Obama: Leave Me The F*ck Alone

The following is an opinion piece written by former President of the United States, Barack Hussein Obama.


Hey everybody. It’s Barack. I wanted to take a moment out of my day to write the piece to just get everyone up to speed on what’s been going on.


Leave me alone starting now.


I’m done. This country is screwed. You know when I was young I kinda believed in like the “oh look I’m gonna go make a difference yay” thing, but you people sure know how to kill a man’s soul. Do you not remember what the fuck was going on when I came in? That fucking financial crisis? What you really thought I wasn’t going to give them that money? Grow up. You need to grow up.


At least I acted like a fucking professional. You guys just elected a guy who assaults women. That’s really fucking low. I was your first black president, stop acting like it’s not obvious. It’s obvious.


And it was a woman running too. Jesus.



Whatever man. You guys are the real losers. “Aww, Barack, he didn’t give me universal healthcare.” Shut your stupid mouth. You got something right? Something? I did the healthcare thing right? Shut up.


None of you could be president.


Fake crying. Give me a fucking break. Fuck you.


I hate you all.


Leave me alone.

-Barack Obama

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